Christmas Music

Those who know me, know that I'm not a huge Christmas music fan. I don't hate it. I just think it has a place.

I used to work at a radio station that played Christmas music ONLY from Thanksgiving through New Year's. This kind of exposure is bad for you. It makes you want to stab yourself in the ears.

My other thing with Christmas music is, why is there so little new Christmas music? Is the best we can do really just those 15 or so songs? Do we really need another version of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen"? Do we ever need to say "ye" again? And don't get me started about the time I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus...

Well to make my Christmas music naseau complete, we were at a very nice luncheon this week sponsored by Nazarene Publishing House. Many thanks and props to them for a nice dinner, for getting people together and for trying to show they care. After dinner though they "treated" us with their newest and top selling Christmas cantata. Did I mention it was a Southern Gospel musical? Thankfully the wait staff had cleared the forks and knives off the table so I couldn't hurt myself. Urgh! Many people thought it was wonderful. I simply did not find it to be my element or in anyway really redeemable.

It came complete with a choir that looked cultishly locked on their leader - scripted smiles, tears of blessing and handraising abounded. Then the two soloist ladies had on dresses that were... well let me describe. One was so shiny and sequened I found myself being mesmerized and drawn to it like a Mosquito to a bug light. The other looked like a cocktail dress from the 80's complete with shiny teel fabric.

And just when I texted my friend sitting next to me "I feel an altar call coming on", the leader stood up and proclaimed, "this would be the spot where we would normally do an altar call..." he hesitated as though thinking of doing one there and then and then I felt many gazes shift to the underdressed publishing house warehouse workers at the table next to mine. I almost cried. Thankfully he moved on into another kind of speech about understanding us and our problems and our "tiredness".

That was truly a classic nightmare come to life.