Halloween 2007

Went trick-or-treating tonight with the kids. Went well with lots of fun. The best part is that the kids just say whatever to the people giving them candy... "Hey! You only have socks on!" and, "You have birds and cats... those don't go together very well!"

Mark and Shirley Marvin came over and they both had on long straight black hair wigs. The kids didn't recognize them at all at first and tried to give them candy like they were trick or treaters. It was hilarious. Mark finally took his wig off and Isaiah said (after 10 minutes of him being in our house with the wig on), "Hey! How did you get here?" Quite funny.

Pray for us. We're just having some tough days lately.

Summoned to Lead

This is the first of hopefully an ongoing "conversation" through blogs/comments about Leonard Sweet's book "Summoned to Lead". A few friends are trying this way of conversing about a similar topic. We'd love you to join us, so comment away, link to your blog, etc. Josh is already blogging on the intro here.

Introduction

I need to be honest as I begin this whole thing. The conversation about doing this on a book thrilled me. The conversation about doing this on a leadership book... not so much. I'm kind of anti-leadership book. It's not that I don't think leadership to be good, important and a reality, but rather that I think if you have to do a bunch of reading on it, then perhaps you're already following and not leading. Besides that, my life is spent in the unique and admittedly oftentimes odd world of the church. But odd as it may be, it's not a company and it's pastor(s) is not a CEO. In fact that whole approach, I would argue, has gotten us into more trouble than good in recent history. The elaboration of that point I'll save for another day (or maybe just for myself). I've said all that to say, I didn't really want to do a leadership book. But my good friend talked me into it and I've had this book in my "to read" stack for quite a while (it kept getting pushed down). So here we go...

Being privy now to my thoughts on this matter it will not suprise you to find that my favorite quotes up front were,
"This is an anit-leadership book. It offers a patentely and passionately unfashionable stance on one of the defining issues of our day." (12)
"To put it bluntly: the whole leadership thing is a demented concept." (12)
"'Now our all-purpose explanation is leadership... We have basically lots of witchcraft, lots of religion, and very little understanding.'" (15 quoting Jim Collins)

So far I'm digging that he also has found leadership as an educational topic and book fodder to be pretty empty. He digs into this further when he begins to elaborate on the concept that leadership is about "hearing" more than "vision". "The words ear and wisdom are the same in ancient Sumerian." (17). In fact in the "famous" passage where Solomon asks God for "wisdom", he actually asks God to give him a "hearing heart". I don't know if this will come up later in the book or not, but I find it fascinating that the man many consider (biblical followers or not) to be the wisest or one of the wisest leaders and kings in history didn't actually ask for wisdom, but for a hearing heart. That is such a different prayer in my opinion than, "God please make me wise". To me one smacks of selfishness and the other of humility.

Sweet addresses this as well, in that humility is a greater attribute than charisma. An interesting thought in light of what many are "looking for" in a leader. If you've ever sat in on pastoral search meeting... well, that just gets funnier. "We need someone who our teens will think is cool and want to hang out with," and "we need a pastor who people are just naturally drawn to," seem so out of place when considering the "hearing heart" prayer.

Sweet then goes on to use Ernest Shackleton as a leadership model and will retrun to his quotes and stories as a reference for this kind of leadership. I dig it. I'm vaguely familiar with Shackleton before this and am excited to hear more about it.

I really liked how he launches out of this intro into the book, "This is a new age of exploration. In this emerging culture, everyone is an explorer, and every profession requires sailing in uncharted waters. " (23) I'm finding this to be more and more true the more life I live. No one is really comfortable. All of us are in new territory. If this is true, then why not allow those who are passionate, called and are heading towards something lead us there? Perhaps a leader these days is as much a curator and gatherer as anything else.

All in all I was encouraged at the end of the intro (this may change - it is about leadership). Mostly because I felt like he was focusing more on being what God has called us to be, than he was on becoming something your not (which I feel like a lot of leadership books are). This is more in tune with my own experiences. Does God really call us out of ourselves or deeper into ourselves? When I look at Scripture I see Gideon as called and not created, learned or born... "for such a time as this", says Esther. I think this theme goes on throughout Scripture.

At the end of the day the question I ask is this:
Is it easier to say "yes, I need to be totally different than I am and will start now to try to become that", than it is to just do what we already know is right? I think the talk of becoming something else is false. I would argue we need to focus more on being more of who we are created to be. Maybe leadership is just being what we're created to be the best we can and know. Maybe this blog is too long already...

Summoned to blog...

Tomorrow is the first day that we'll be sharing... you are summoned to join us. Tom this means you. And you too with the hair.

I've heard from a few of my friends in Maryland this week... yeah! Miss you guys and gals. My friend Jordan sent this funny video. It is a good one... rated PG. He always finds GREAT videos.

Yeah Aunt Sherri

My sister is here visiting. Its great to be together. She is from "Hot-lanta" and is not so hot, cuz its cold here. We'll be hanging out through the weekend. She is one of the best "stealthy" players of the classic youth group outside game, Underground Church, ever to live.

Oops, forgot Introduction

Tomorrow Josh and I will be blogging on the Introduction to the aforementioned book. Then we'll do Chapter 1 on Tuesday and then Ch. 2 on the next Friday and so on. Really, you should join us. Really. Seriously. You know you want to. You won't get addicted, EVERYBODY is doing it.

Open Invitation to Leadership Book Discussion

My good friend Josh (who also enjoys a good Fritz's stop) and I are going to start reading Leonard Sweet's book on leadership together and we'd like to invite whoever to join us in our discussions here. The book is entitled, "Summoned to Lead" and we are going to start with chapter 1 this week and then proceed with another chapter every 3 days or so. I've never done anything like this so I don't know if anyone has any interest in this sort of thing, or if it will work at all, but I'm all for trying. Anyone and everyone is welcome, the only request is that you actually read the chapter and stay on topic. Oh, and you should agree with me on everything... kidding, only kidding. The point is to help each other think!

Jahred's Birthday

This weekend we went to St. Louis and met Carol's sister and her family, and later Carol's dad and stepmom. It was a good time. We went to the Children's Museum, the Zoo and did some swimming at the hotel. We also did the gift thing and just hung out.

Today he brought in cupcake-cones to his class at school. He also got some Star Wars e-cards from me. Then when I got home from work he opened our gifts and then we went to Chuck E Cheese (kiddie Vegas) for more fun. All in all I'd say it was a great birthday.

Special thanks to all you who sent out cards, etc. He loves getting mail!

Great Quotes

So my good friend Josh and I have been talking (emailing) about good quotes and he tipped me to a great quote sight. You should check it out, it's quite good. This conversation lead to conversation of Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) and one of his great short stories, "Political Economy". Everytime I read this I laugh aloud. I recommend reading it out loud and to a few friends.

Cuz friends are friends forever...

If you're singing the rest of the words to that song right now, stop and kick yourself.

We had a great freind over tonight from back in Bel Air. Rebekah Aversano came out here to live and work at IHOP (not International House of Pancakes... International House of Prayer). She's so great. She was in our youth group in Bel Air, went to NYC 03, gave it all to Jesus, has been to China, blah, blah. awesome. It was good to have her around and just do life together. She kept us updated on her family (yeah Aversanos!!) and just enjoyed laughing at ours. It was good!!

Great Weekend!

Just wrapping up a great weekend and let you in on some of it...
- Friday night - took kids to "Fritz's" a restaurant with trains all over and trains that actually bring food to your table. They LOVED it! Isaiah especially.

- Saturday - kids went to "Uncle" Mark and "Aunt" Shirley's house. Carol and I got to go out and eat a great dinner. Then we went and experienced some GREAT jazz at 18th and Vine.

- Sunday - kids stayed night at Mark and Shirley's and so we slept in and enjoyed the day together. Another nice dinner, then pick up kids and bring them home and to bed!

It was very, very nice.

I Missed Gathering

This past week was the Emergent Gathering in Glorieta, New Mexico. I wasn't there. Lots of friends were. bummer. So I'm living vacariously through some others as they have recorded their thoughts on blogs and such. One good blog on it is by Will Samson here. I share in his encouragement and hope for the future for this great group of people.

Perhaps some of this is due to my recent loss of church family and consequent search for a new one, but I'm more passionate than ever about this conversation. Perhaps I'll post some more of my specific experiences and thoughts in the future here, but I'm really realizing the need for the church to engage culture and seek out where God is already working.

Had I been at the Gathering, I would have tried to host a conversation entitled, "Needing another Boaz: the future of existing churches and the need for shepherds". The focus would have been on the relationship between those in existing church structures (playing the role of Boaz) and those who are doing new things (playing the role of Ruth). For more on this read the book of Ruth and see whose shoes you think you better fill in the story - Ruth - the newcomer, outsider; Boaz - the older established person who is an advocate for Ruth; or perhaps the rest of the town - who aren't quite sure what to make of this new one and her role amongst them.

There are some thoughts to be harvested on this conversation in my specific context of the Nazarene denomination as well.

Good website, good food

Go to www.chipotle.com for good fun and to Chipotle the restaurant for good food. [While I am not being paid to suggest this, if you work for Chipotle and would like to thank me for my priceless endorsement, feel free!] It's just good stuff.

GK and me

Let me begin by clearly disclaiming that I am a dork. In case you were operating under some other pretense, let me set the record straight. Now on to my story...

I found out Monday night that Garrison Keillor (of Prarie Home Companion fame) perhaps the greatest story teller of our life-time, was going to be in town on Tuesday night. Now for most people this may be neat or even a little interesting, but for me it's just plain exciting. I LOVE good stories and he's been doing great stories for a really long time and he just plain knows how to write and tell good stories. Therefore, upon recieving the news of his appearance in the great place of Overland Park, Kansas, I got a little giddy (dork meter is spiking).

Upon a few inquiries I recieved the news that the show had been sold out. Despite my dampened spirits I pressed on in my pursuit to see this great man and show. With no other recourse before me, I showed up at the theater with hopes of charming, cajoling, lying, sneaking or buying my way in. As I walked up to the building I realized that I was excited and nervous and just plain giddy the way many people get when going to see their favorite band of all time... except I was going to see a story teller (dork meter at full!).

As I walk in the door an hour before the show starts, there are several signs posted, "Tonight's Show is Sold Out". The Box Office has all their mini-blinds of protection drawn and closed (the universal sign for "you can't even see light for hope so forget about coming to this show"). The only window open was the "Will Call". I got in the line. It was kinda long and full of people whose hair color had long left them. I pressed on. When I finally arrived at the window, I looked the man in the eye (through the bullet proof 6 inch glass), and said (through the cheese grater hole), "So you really don't have any more tickets, huh?" I was expecting the "here's your sign" look as he pointed to the sign right above the window that said "Show sold out". But he responded, "Actually... I have 1 ticket left." I smiled from ear to ear and said, "I'll take it!", trying not to sound like the soon- to- be-16 yr old who has been asked if he wants a new car for his birthday.

After purchasing the ticket, I proceed to the theater, grinning ear to ear for my good fortune (praying does work kids!), and with the thought that I will be sitting in a folding chair in the tunnel in the upper deck behind the 7 ft. tall man with a giant head. Oh well, I'll still get to hear him in person.

I hand my ticket to the usher who looks at me, then looks at the ticket and then says, "take the first aisle and they will help you". Hmmmmm. My seat is good. My seat is really good. It turns out that my seat is the very seat that I would have chosen had they given me the chance to pick any seat in the entire theater. I'm 7 rows back in the very middle, pretty much eye to eye with Mr. Keillor himself.

The show was amazing. He spoke for almost 2 hours and I barely thought 2 minutes had passed. He sang a few short songs that he had written himself. He told stories. He made us laugh. He laughed. He took this group of many hundreds and made us all feel like we were in another place, right there in the story. While you knew others were around, somehow you also knew that no one else was there with you in the story. I'm so glad I went. It was just fantastic.

If you've never heard Garrison Keillor before, you should. As I told the season ticket holder who was sitting next to me and had never really even heard of GK, "You're going to like it." And when you do listen, your response will be the same as his as we walked out, "You were right. I loved it!"

Two dates and some general grumblings!

Saturday morning and early afternoon Carol and I got to go out. Carol set it all up. We went to the Kemper Art Museum and hung out looking at art, really liking some of it and not really getting some of it, and then we ate at the cafe in the museum which is awesome with art all over. We had such a good time just hanging out and talking. Then on our way home we had a little time so we stopped at an estate sale in a really nice neighborhood. It really makes you think about what you'll leave behind when you walk through someone's house and look at all their stuff that their family really doesn't want but played a role in their life. It's weird. I wonder what I'll leave behind for my family to sort through, sell, throw out and maybe keep? Although with Ebay and my increasing popularity there will probably be a high demand for anything that I've ever touched or used. (hahahahha... if Carol reads this she'll probably burn all my stuff NOW)

Then Saturday night I went with Meg and one of her friends to her school skating party (it was "Glow" night). Meg had never skated before, so it was a little rough for a while, but she did better at the end. I played the dorky, dutiful dad who got the pizza, helped make sure no one fell too hard and watched the table while they played games. It was funny to me, because I felt like such a dork, but also because of my memories of Junior High roller skating. That's a world I thought was dead, but found out its not. There are still the slow kids, the fast kids, the kids trying to tricks in the middle, and the really annoying rollerbladers/roller hockey kids. I took the same approach this time as I did when I was in Junior High, "knock everyone down... no one is off limits". Little kids littered the floor. OK, not really this time.

Today we tried another church. While I will not comment on its name or whether we will try it again... let me say this - is it too much to ask a preacher to actually think about what they are saying instead of just rying to come up with some points or principals that you can pull out of the air and apply to any situation? I'm beginning to think that it really is too much to ask.

My wife is mocking my old age, so I need to go to bed.

Funny Story

Just went to the bathroom. When I arrived and went to down the zipper, I realized that this was not necessary as the zipper had already been down. How long? Who was I around? Was the giggling I heard in the other office due to that? It's a good thing many large and important decisions are entrusted to me.

We threw a party

last night! We had all the staff over that work for NYI USA/Canada for a party. It was fun, except the Humberto and his wife could not come. We provided the place/space, some hamburgers and hotdogs, and chips; Dave brought flowers (a regular Renaissance man), chicken for the grill, coffee beans (good thing, cuz I had just run out), and a cake from Dean and Delucca (Chocolate Raspberry!); Sandrine brought an Oreo cake that said "Yay! NYI funtime!"; Amy brought salad; RJ and Angie brought the sodas. It was great! Besides all of the food, we had some great conversations, laughter and of course fun with my children!

Some highlights include conversations about about Johnny Cash (country or rock-n-roll? rock-n-roll - duh and perhaps even the father of rock-n-roll); me rambling to poor RJ about Lesslie Newbigin and how he should be included in all missiology classes; Kate playing with Sandrine's shoes; realizing that RJ's wife, Angie grew up on the same district as I did and was in the same impact team with my sister and knows my brother's wife Jenifer (it is truly a small world afterall - that Jiminy Cricket is one smart dude).

I love having people in our house! I love parties! I love telling stories! I love making friends! I love giving gifts!

Then Carol and I watched Survivor together (yeah Tivo!!!!!!!!). Nice. Very nice.

Giving Gifts

What has God given you? What can you share with someone else, without condition, without any strings attached? When you give a gift you give it out of what you have. Sometimes these gifts are physical resources and sometimes they are time or just our presence. Let’s give many gifts. Let’s share with one another. Let’s give and expect nothing in return. Freely as you have received, freely give.

Besides just being a good way of life, this kind of giving brings incredible joy. When you are experiencing God in ways like “Throwing Parties” and “Telling Stories”, what a wealth of things to share! In the words of the great theologians U2 “You’ve got to give it away!” The only way to really keep something is to give it away.

Joyce Meyers, some farming and a little mother-in-law

Tom Young keep your scalding email about my bad blogging to yourself. I'm back to it.

Thursday and Friday I was at Joyce Meyers' conference in St. Louis. Not as a participant/attendee, but as an observer. They were using a lot of the same facilities that we wiil be in 2007, so I was able to go and see it in action. It was very helpful.

But I know you don't care about that... here are the funny stories -
1) Actually printed on a brochure - "No men. No babies." I was actually stopped twice (despite my credentials) and told that to get in, I had to go see the special people.

2) 15,000 + women plus Brian = uncomfortable.

3) One woman actually said - "Hey! You're a guy!"

Saturday we went to see my uncle and aunt, and cousin, on their cattle farm in Iberia, Missouri. It was great. The kids got to run around, see cattle, and just be around good people. It was a lot of fun. Best line of the visit... Meg says, "Are those your cows?" My uncle says, "Yes they are. I understand you're going to be enjoying one of those this winter." Meg "........"

Today we met up with Carol's mom and a couple of her friends on their vacation at Osage Beach. It was a nice visit. A LOT of food. It really went well and was probably just the right amount of time.

Heard from my good friend David Rebello too. Word is out that he's up and posting from ljubljiana (loo-blee-on-ya), Slovenia. David is the man and we're praying for him and his continued time there.

If you're a Marylander and reading this... how about a call or email this week. We miss you guys.